Ahoy there me hearties! Avast you lubber! No, MBM hasn't finally flipped, but is practising for International Talk Like A Pirate Day which takes place today.

The worldwide annual event is likely to see lots of boaters using chat up lines like "How'd you like to scrape the barnacles off of me rudder?" and "I've sailed the seven seas, and you're the sleekest schooner I've ever sighted".

The day will also doubtless see vast quantities of grog sunk by all who take part. Now which bilge rat has got the skipper's wooden leg and his parrot?